Posts

Hunting for Apartments

Image
  You may eventually find yourself needing a place to call a home of your own or possibly may be needing a room mate or just to relocate for any number of personal reasons. At any rate, searching for an apartment requires a strategic mindset of thinking for a positive outcome in long term aspects. Learning about what to expect and researching beforehand will be beneficial to making an informed decision. Firstly, price range, have you calculated and figured how much you can afford before deciding on an apartment? Be sure to realistically ask yourself, "how much can I afford & will having a room mate be a smart choice?" Before going into partnership with a roommate it's important to establish an equal understanding of shared responsibilities including the lease duration and deposits, also what deposits are to be expected with a holistic view of timeframes. It's also a smart idea to inquire about amenities, whether there is a gym, pool, running trails, co

Outside

Image
Out there the sky is still slightly blue and will soon be a beautiful array of colorful evening lights. I like to call it God's canvas and each day a different shape and form; unique and indescribable in its own beautiful way, especially in the beautiful 505 a place they call the Land of Enchantment. The skies here are often breathtaking and can calm the heart in even the darkest of times. I often find serenity in my observation of trees, one of my personal favorites is the dark outlined silhouettes of these magnificent wonders agains the backdrop of the ever changing colors in the evening sky. Looking as the leaves sway in the gentle breeze and hearing the sweet melodies of the lingering birds singing fare thee well to yet another day to have tried.  The twinkling of lights appear as the night sky turns to black.

Fear of Failure

Image
  I am so utterly thankful and lost for words at the enormous blessings that have been bestowed upon our family. In my heart I am so honored to be given an opportunity and I hope with all my heart that I do not squander this moment away with fears of failure that steer me to not trying and ultimately failing due to lack of effort. Yesterday I finally received my first ever gifted laptop from Apple and I even got to order it and modify it to my specifications. I'm truly excited and so utterly thankful and beyond elated. Thank you daddy and my handsome Sven for being so generous and thoughtful men in my life. I wish to return to school and continue my education so that I am able to financially care for my children with my handsome loving partner Sven by my side. I am very grateful for him and everything he does for me, and our family but I want to also share in that experience and to do for us as well.  I know that I am capable and that I now have the resources and the on

My Heart Still Beats

Image
Deep Breaths, heart still beating... Life is too short to not inhale the life that's meant for you,... I woke up this morning with running on my mind,.. I didn't want to get out of bed, but there was so much in my head. Everything around me is changing, inside and out of my heart and home,  chaotic at times but my heart still beats.

Lost

Image
May 23, 2020 I got lost today in the bosque but I wasn’t alone. It was scary because there was a realization that I have no control. A feeling of helplessness and a loss of direction. It’s silly to think that had I not had a destination in mind, I would never had been able to claim being lost to begin with. The brush was thickening all around as we navigated through paths barely seen yet very much felt I found myself losing things along the way, this revelation did not arrive until later. When it finally came time to cross a water path, it was here that I found myself running into harm's way, he told me to be careful but I guess I couldn't help myself. I got a cut as I made a path for those behind me in my care, after that first cut more cuts came all on one hand because I finally realized my hand was bleeding. It was a thorn bush of a tree that got its repayment to me for interrupting his serene homestead of solace, broken with my mere presence. I squeezed my

In the Blink of an Eye

Image
Tomorrow’s today is never promised. A day of age where everyone is quarantined A sickness is spreading Tomorrow’s not guaranteed Fear flows faster as each day grows  People in their hearts, they go cold It no longer matters if your young or old, People are losing self control Guns blazing all around, Helicopters heard from the ground Government continues to tell white lies Children are still hungry, nobody hears their cries Body counts are rising, Nobody can stop the pain.

My Mind is a Disarray

Image
A blank screen another thought. Headspace is a reflection of my imperfection, Can’t seem to get it straight. I want to scream and shout my anger, sometimes I wish my sun would set. Instead I sit and wonder why as a tear rolls down my eye... Can’t ever let them see me cry. Can’t seem to maintain, everything done in vain it seems, I try to explain but I’m nothing but a walking mistake. When will I break? Life isn’t a such piece of cake, how much will it take, everything’s at stake. Trying to get some peace of mind,... Positivity and encouragement, are my crime Negativity only brings me down feels like I’m drowning Trying not to wear this frown, remembering along the way  to śtraighten my crown.. I know I say can't alot, but in retrospect I can And I will overcome 🖤